Today’s title above is a somewhat esoteric reference to an old Noel Coward song that I’m fairly sure is no longer considered PC—so I won’t include any of the lyrics here (“Use the Google!” as Mom would yell); suffice it to say that the song refers to blistering heat, which caused the mercury to rise in the Upper Delaware River region over the last few days. And no, I’m not complaining—just making conversation. There was plenty of that (conversation) to go around last week, and with my arm still in a sling (“don’t ask!” as Aunt Ethel would yell), I chose to stay on the New York side of the river, making my way to Forestburgh (www.fbplayhouse.org) for the first show of the season, then to Narrowsburg (www.delawarevalleyartsalliance.org) to check out the Deep Water Literary Fest, followed by a trip to Bethel for the third annual (like ’em on Facebook) Kauneonga Block Party, where the aforementioned heat inspired Dharma the Wonder Dog to turn to social media (like her page too!) begging for a stroller, and as luck [sic] would have it, a “secret admirer” bought her one. Oy.

One of those conversations centered on the fact that I frequently write about events that have already passed, which (according to my sources) is mildly annoying. “You reviewed a play here that was already over!” a nice lady yelled, while petting the dog. “So I missed it!” she said bitterly. “Don’t do that!” Properly chastised, I took my seat with the others who were clever enough to make reservations without waiting for my permission, and sat back to bask in a performance of Robert Harling’s smartly written “Steel Magnolias” which is (uh oh) no longer happening at the Forestbugh Playhouse. While chatting with producer Franklin Trapp after the show, I shared the nice lady’s comments. “Tell her to go to our website!” he yelled in response. “Or gives us a call! There are plenty of shows to see all season long!”

I will be writing reviews online (www.riverreporter.com) for many productions well in advance of closing, but don’t wait for my thoughts; get out there and support local, local, local. We can discuss it after the fact. Even though they’ve already left the building, the six actresses—Rebecca Simon, Liane Zielinski, Claudia Schneider, Abby Anderson, Jennifer Evans, and Kimberlee Monroe—all deserve a shout-out nonetheless for their sharply drawn portrayal of Harling’s drawling “magnolias” and their complicated Southern lives. The next show (“Million Dollar Quartet”) plays until July 1, so don’t yell at me if you miss it.

And if you missed any of the first Deep Water Literary Fest, which was billed as a “three-day extravaganza of the written word-incorporating  readings, theatre, film and visual art,” well—based on the successful event that I observed (nyaa nyaa), there will be other opportunities in the future. The festival was created by Aaron Hicklin (www.onegrandbooks.com) in association with the Delaware Valley Arts Alliance (DVAA) and included a “marathon reading of ‘The Oddysey’” (which I won’t go into, because some of you missed it) and a visit with popular author A.M. Homes, who read excerpts from her new book “Days of Awe,” which I found riveting. If you did miss it though, you can still go to One Grand in Narrowsburg (local, local, local!) and buy the book.

As the temperature rose, so did my anxiety over hosting the “spirit of the ‘60s” costume contest to be held at the third annual Kauneonga Block Party. It is held yearly on Father’s Day, creating a fantastic (IMHO) opportunity for the entire family (yes, there’s a kids zone). You can get outside and enjoy great food while perusing scads of vendors’ booths and listening to a tremendous variety of live music presented throughout the day before taking a dip or dining lakeside in one of the many choices on Kauneonga’s “restaurant row.” The contest drew hippies, go-go girls and Woodstock alumni, parading before celebrity judges, while my dog watched from the sidelines in her princess coach. Oy. To view all of the photos, visit our new photo gallery at www.riverreporter.com. And feel free to start a conversation when next we meet. But please—don’t yell.