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Who’s to blame anyway?

Many times I’ve told you about my mornings of laundry and kids. Every morning like so many moms, I remind my children not to forget their lunch money or books and then send them out the door. I’ve been thankful my most precious belongings were safely tucked away into their classrooms learning about wonderful things like languages, arts and science.

Last week I was in a meeting when my mother faxed me a note from her office in South Carolina. "They’re shooting kids again. Turn on channel four, " she instructed.

"Shooting kids again..." that phrase is becoming all too common.

The television was already on when I got home and this latest tragedy was incorporated into another viewing day. The screen was filled with images of pain, children crying, and parents waiting with horrifying fear of the unknown.

A young girl, reeling from horror, recalled the details of seeing her friend’s face blown off, saying, "They asked if she believed in God; she said yes so they shot her in the face," she said.

A daughter remembered her father and brave kids waiting with a beloved teacher while he died. They showed him pictures of his family as he took his last breath. She said that human bravery and love showed through the battle within the school.

As the cameras panned out, we got a "break" as we checked on the war in Yugoslavia. We could then see images of crying babies sleeping in tents, homes destroyed, genocide reminiscent of Nazi Germany and bombs from the air strikes.

Then it’s back to the now neatly-titled coverage of "Carnage at Colombine," and students in black trench coats initiating mass murder on Hitler’s birthday.

NBC broke into coverage with something "on the lighter side," according to Today Show anchor Matt Lauer, as he did an interview with Monica Lewinski.

TV coverage continued as SWAT teams entered and the murderer’s bodies were removed. Then there was a station break as a gun appeared, followed by actress, Bernadette Peters, promoting the musical "Annie Get your Gun." The ad ended with Ms. Peters blowing over the end of the pistol and winking.

Back in Colorado, the father of the only dead black student is interviewed. "He was hunted because he was black," he said.

So why does this happen to nice people in nice schools?

This week I’ve listened to many opinions and reasons. Parents blamed the schools. How did they not notice that these children were on a self-destruct mission? Then there were other parents who didn’t object to a sawed-off shotgun hanging on the wall as a decoration.

What about that neighbor who heard explosions going off? The SWAT team was blamed for not responding fast enough. "I had a son in that school, too." came the defense.

Television promptly gave us information on how to look up the Internet instructions for building better weapons and bombs. So I ask: who is to blame? Gangster rap music, the manufacturers of black trench coats, irresponsible acting by Leonardo DiCaprio? Is it a moral breakdown and the destruction of family, or the removal of prayer from schools?

What about our heroes and role models? Roy Rogers and John Wayne carried weapons. Did that lead to all of this violence?

The newspapers tell us that in 1996, handguns were used to murder two people in New Zealand, 15 in Japan, 30 in Great Britain, 106 in Canada, 213 in Germany and 9,390 in the United States.

Actor Charlton Heston, head of the National Rifle Association, said that if the school was supplied with an armed guard the problem would have been stopped immediately.

The other morning the father of one of the Arkansas school killers was interviewed with his attorney. "I live 800 miles away from my ex-wife, but I’ve have always been in constant contact by phone with my 13-year-old son," he said. Can telephone technology provide an active roll in the raising of a child?

This morning the sun came up as usual. I poured myself some coffee, stepped over the laundry and the dog and got ready for my day. I gave my children an extra hug. I can only hope and pray that the day will be safe for them.

Today, after listening and crying for those moms putting their babies to rest in a far away place, I prayed that in my hometown our school will not become a war zone. I prayed that my babies would never know the pain of shrapnel. I prayed that today I’m a little more observant of the people in my children’s lives. I prayed that together as a community, with the help of friends, teachers and law enforcement professionals, I can help lead my children to their futures, not with hate and fear, but with strength and faith. But I know in my heart that what happened in Colorado can happen to any of us.