Passion in the kitchen

My friends all know that my home is my weekend passion. This weekend, I have decided to lock myself upstairs in my office. I do like order in my life, but tonight I’m hiding.

It began with a clogged kitchen sink. I turned on the water and it didn’t go down. Generally, I look under the sink about as often as I wander into my basement. But since I’m a modern woman, I know what to do, and I am armed with a toolbox!

I got out my really big wrench and prepared to crawl under to take the trap apart. I put a bucket under the trap and did my best to feel around without looking. I turned the wrench a little and felt water spill over my hands. With one eye open, I looked to see what was spilling into the bucket. I had to wonder where that piece of metal came from. I really hoped it was not too important. Oops, the metal piece was important; just about all the old plumbing was disintegrating before my eyes. My daughter saw me sitting on the floor holding onto the metal with a dazed look on my face. She just shook her head.

“Mom, I don’t know how to break this to you,” she said, “but it’s time for a new kitchen. Don’t worry; I’ll help you plan it all out.”

I don’t ever want to agree with the kid but I thought that this time she was right. The old tin cabinet and enamel sink were finally done. The alternative was washing the dishes in the bathtub, and I just didn’t think that was going to happen.

First came the magazines for the ideas so that when we called the builder we have an idea of what we want. The builder already knew that I hate to spend money so he broke it to me gently. He asked me what I wanted to spend. I said about $1,000. He smiled as he reached for the clipboard and I knew I was in trouble.

We started with the cabinets, sink and fixtures. “Let’s see now, if you add a counter top then you need electrical outlets, and how about those windows?”

I only need them to open if I use the kitchen for cooking. So far, it hasn’t been too bad. I limit any serious cooking to the winter months during major snowstorms. Summer is for barbecuing! He didn’t seem to buy that, so we added a few windows.

“Now what about that door? If I change one, then the second has to go, too.” Okay, put some doors on the list.

Now that there would be a counter, wouldn’t it be nice to plug in your mixer? I don’t own one. But my daughter, willing to help, added one to her list. Add the electrician to the group. Of course, we had to lose the wallpaper and there was the issue of plaster walls.

I had never seen this kid so happy as she added to her list. More painting for mom and a new color selection of dishes, cups, utensils for her. “While we are at it,” she said, “we could use a mixer, toaster, blender and a juicer.” Ching... ching... ching... First National Bank of Mom is here. I added everything up and luckily was still within sight of my budget.

Now came the hard part: packing up the old cabinets. My daughter was brutal, throwing out anything and everything. I reminded her that it might take a few weeks before everything is finished, and we needed to keep some of the utensils until then.

Everything was packed in boxes and stacked up the dining room, which was okay since I’d decided to stay upstairs until all of the work was finished. The kitchen was empty and echoed. She suggested a new floor. I had to draw the line. The old floor stays!

The two of us packed up everything in one long night. I was tired and had to work early in the morning. I made my way around the stuff and headed up stairs. My six a.m. alarm is my dog. I wandered downstairs at 7:00 a.m. and saw old pal Hercules lying on his back. Odd, I said to myself. Then I noticed. He had found a case of “oodles of noodles” soup, which he opened and devoured during the night. Looks like he’d inhaled a few boxes of chocolate chip pop tarts, too. I was afraid to give him water; those noodles might just expand. I grabbed his collar and tried to drag him outside. He was just not going to budge. It really makes me wonder what’s in that soup. Well, looks like he’s going to be staying outside for a while, and I’m staying in my office.

But when it’s all done, I will have a nice kitchen with windows that work. I can hardly wait for my next project. Probably some nice siding, because the old siding won’t complement the windows and doors… which will, of course, lead to the new picket fence and lawn furniture.