Holiday stress
vs. holiday joy!

By SHARON L. HAGEMANN

The stress of everyday events prevents many of us from achieving optimal health at all levels—mind, body and spirit.

In addition to daily stressors, the holiday season represents a time when hectic schedules, melancholy memories, unrealistic behaviors and added expenses result in overwhelming feelings of anxiety, tension and depression. But the holidays can also be a joyous time, when friends and relatives come together to share traditions and celebrate what’s special to them about this season.

The key to happy holidays is taking care of yourself—the entire package of body, mind and spirit. And, essential to caring for yourself and enjoying the season is simplifying whatever/whenever you can.

The first rule is to realize, and act on the knowledge, that you can’t do everything, much less do it perfectly. Do only what will be pleasurable and meaningful to you. This is not the time to do things just because your family “always did it this way,” or because everyone else celebrates Hanukkah, Kwanzaa or Christmas in a certain fashion.

At this point you may be saying: “This sounds fine in theory, but how do I prevent feelings of stress on a practical level?”

Below are some tips for creating a joyful season:

FINANCIAL TIPS

• Prepare a holiday budget and stick to it! Only spend on each gift what you can really afford, and there is no rule that you have to give everyone a gift just because they give you one or have in the past.
• Explain to your children that Santa (and you) have limitations and they can’t expect to receive everything on their lists.
• Look for free and inexpensive community events for the holidays. Or do fun activities together, such as taking a walk to see holiday decorations, Christmas caroling or sledding.

TIPS FOR PARENTS

• Hold a family meeting to discuss family events and activities. Discuss what would be fun/special to each member and come to a consensus on family activities, making certain the emphasis is on quality, not quantity.
• Post a holiday calendar, reflecting family and individual commitments.
• Keep the kids’ wish list simple and help them prepare the gift list for others. Remind them that a gift’s importance is not determined by the amount of money spent. Emphasize homemade gifts and gifts of time (e.g. free snow shoveling).
• Include your children in the holiday preparations. Have them help with gift-wrapping, decorating or cooking/baking. Even the smallest children can tape down the corners of a package. Your children’s participation will add to your joy.

TIPS FOR PREVENTING PHYSICAL STRESS

• Don’t turn to food, alcohol or drugs to cope with your stress. Although these may appear to work in the short term, they will only increase the amount of stress on your body over time.
• Don’t go shopping, or to a party, hungry.
• Try to maintain your exercise or physical activities schedule, but be realistic. Realize that you may not get to the gym or your aerobics class as often, but take a walk or have a snowball fight with your family, instead.
• Take time for a massage or luxurious bubble bath, or pamper your tired feet with your favorite scented oil.

TIPS FOR SPIRITUALITY

• Snuggle up in your favorite chair, close your eyes and reflect on what the holidays really mean to you.
• Think back to previous holidays you have enjoyed and remember the traditions or activities that gave you the most joy. Then, try to include them in this year’s plan.
• Do something for those less fortunate. Volunteer at a soup kitchen, take a meal to a sick or elderly neighbor or “adopt” a family. The possibilities for philanthropy are endless!
• Take a few minutes in the midst of a busy day and breathe deeply, meditate or pray. All of these elicit the relaxation response, as well as bring us into contact with our spiritual center.
• Observe the traditions of your religion or culture, or create your own rituals. A “ritual” can be as simple as lighting candles and reading a favorite passage or poem. Or, create a ritual around decorating the tree.