This week, we will hear her sing at Carnegie Hall with a Skidmore College choir and celebrate her birthday in the city. By age 21, most of the barriers to adulthood have been breached. For American kids, it means you are legal to purchase alcohol. For a family whose living depends on people drinking it, we would find it hard to be tee-totalers ourselves. But our family is full of people whose lives have been destroyed by the very substance that sustains us. When our daughter comes home for her birthday this weekend, she’ll celebrate at home with good champagne and at her father’s bar with tap beer. With what she has taught me, I know enough to trust her to do it all with care.